Where No Man Has Gone Before ...

Today was quite interesting ... after church, Cheshirewoodgie wanted to go down to the bridal fair at the community center ... I suspected that I'd be the only guy there. As it turns out, I was one of three ... however, the other two had booths for services (DJ'ing and tuxes). I was the only one there who was a potential customer.

It was rather funny ... based on a comment in the Indiebride boards, Woodgie noted that this would be an excursion to see the local "marital-industrial complex". Come to think of it, since
the community center and local National Guard armory share the same space in town, it was a convergence of both the "marital-industrial complex" and "military-industrial complex" as well.

First impressions for guys:

1. Bridal fairs do serve lots of samples ... wedding cake, wedding cupcakes, and chocolate, especially. This is a good thing; it helps to keep you going when you realize how much you could, in theory, spend on your wedding.
2. Wedding photographers, as a constant, are expensive ... when you realize that the prizes they are offering are discounts to make their wedding photo packages more affordable, you realize how expensive they are to hire.
3. In some ways, it's rather like a home show, only different.
4. Even though you liked the scent of the Mary Kay after-shave lotion, don't admit this until you are out of earshot of the consultant.

Mid-Week

Another day here at Chez Richard and Lauren, where we're both recovering from staying up to 1:00 to watch election results ... tomorrow will be a rest and recuperation day; Cheshirewoodgie goes to the docs tomorrow for medical tests (gallbladder function), and some dental work after that, so tomorrow will be a day of caretaking, since the test in question involves no eating prior to the test and leaves her a little woozy afterward.

Earlier this year, we'd thought about going down to Arrowhead Stadium to tailgate and watch our respective schools (Pitt State and Northwest) play, but we held off ... as much as I'm a Pitt alumni, I thought they had a slim chance against the Bearcats last weekend, which turned to none after listening to the first five minutes of the game ... it hurts to hear your alma mater get pasted on the field.

Cheshirewoodgie says there's an easy cure for that ... just become a Bearcat fan ;-).

We did have some good news ... in an earlier post, I'd mentioned that we were going through the required pastoral pre-marriage counseling and getting ready to petition the diocese bishop for approval to be married in the church. Thankfully, we got word that the bishop had approved us ... yay! Now we can start more detail planning (or at least, start on those items we had to hold on until we knew for certain that we were approved for). Like sitting down with the organist and organizing musicians. And working up a service order. And selecting readings. And writing vows. That sort of thing ....

Gearing Up for the Holidays

How hard is it to buy a Christmas tree? Given we have 3 cats, one of which has a rapidly-developing vertical jump, we had to ask ourselves that question earlier in the week ... especially since the youngest, Stinkerbelle, has a well-documented tendency to go after ornaments, tinsel, or Christmas lights. Never having had pets, I've never had to worry about keeping the bright shiny things away from the kitties, but this year, we had to strategize tree placement and decorating. It looks like we'll be doing a small tree in the living room (placed high enough so Stinky can see the tree but not destroy it), and a slightly larger tree in the bedroom, with a door/porch wreath, an outdoor (wire frame) tree, and also some lighting on the bird feeder tree (also a wire frame tree). We also hope (if Brookstone can ship them before Thanksgiving) to also have some decorative candles (electric and cat-safe, of course), for the windows.

Celebrating Homecoming ... By Staying at Home

This weekend at Chez Lauren and Richard was pretty quiet ... Friday was Walkout Day, a pre-Homecoming tradition at Northwest where the school closes down the day before Homecoming weekend. I was a little tired from the day before; the weather cleared off enough mid-week to let me take care of some to-do list items: weed whacking around the house, edging and mulching the rose garden, edging and re-mulching the rock garden, and edging and mulching the garden strip at the front of the house, but she wanted to do something productive on the day off, so Lauren and I spent most of Friday rehabbing the bedroom closet.

"Rehabbing" meant taking out the existing hangar bar, sorting winter/summer clothes to send downstairs, selecting older clothes to put out on Freecycle, and putting in a new double hangar bar with shelving on either side. After nine hours straight, we had a much better organized closet. We're saving reorganizing the office/storage closet of chaos for another week.

Homecoming itself we took a pass on, because we weren't able to get tickets to the game. Just as well ... it was wet, cold, and miserable, so instead, we spent the weekend at a slower place: some cooking of comfort food (Lauren's patented chicken noodle soup) on Saturday evening, followed by a crafts project for Lauren (repairing a keepsake box made by her parents).

On Sunday, we walked to church despite the cold weather (and ultimately, halfway into the walk and again after church, through light snowflakes). This evening was our next to last "pre-letter" meeting with our minister before he submits the letter to the diocese bishop asking for permission to marry Lauren and myself, and now, I'm in the living room, updating the blog with Opie on my lap while Lauren grades student assignments.

One Ring to Rule Them All ....

One more step toward marriage: Lauren and I chose our rings this week ... after sorting through a few designs, we settled on this one.













We wanted something stylish, but not too extravagant, and settled on a titanium design (very light and hypoallergenic), that nicely complemented the Claddagh rings we chose for our engagement.

When it came to choosing an inscription, we were making the usual Lord of the Rings jokes about the "One Ring to rule them all ...", and it took a bit of thought to come up with an appropriate engraving other than that. Since the two of us are both fans of mystic poet Jalal-Uddin Rumi, we arrived at this:

"Lovers don't finally meet somewhere. They're in each other all along."

Of course, we'll probably continue to joke that in order to read the inscription properly, you'll have to throw the rings into a fire ....

Fine Dining in Maryville???

This week's been kinda slow ... for me that is, not for Lauren. It's mid-term season for her. Me, it's been quiet, apart from the usual fun with job hunting (still looking), wrestling with bureaucracy (towards filing for unemployment ... not what I wanted to be doing at this point in my life but the right job hasn't shown up yet). In the meantime (and this is by no means filler ... okay, some of it is), after a trip to Des Moines to pick up the last load of items I'd left pre-move with a friend, I thought I'd reflect upon the change in dining opportunities.

When I first moved to Maryville, I was used to a variety of good, ethnic restaurants in Des Moines ... ADong downtown for Vietnamese, with its 137 menu options, succulent springrolls, and never-fail bowls of steaming, fragrant pho, for Thai-leaning Chinese Cafe Su (home of the best, biggest crab rangoon anywhere and the only place to find dim sum in Des Moines), Cookry for traditional African (the groundnut stew is a must, as well as the jerk chicken, and if you're there on a Saturday, you must try the fufu), Thai Flavors on 14th or Cool Basil for excellent Pad Thai, and the Des Moines Art Center restaurant on weekends and First Fridays for the monthly-changing "surprise me" and excellent desserts, among other restaurants I haven't named yet. When I moved to Maryville, I was wondering if I was downgrading that area of my life. Although there aren't as many restaurants here as in Des Moines, there are a couple of notable places (and some I haven't tried yet), ranging from upscale ethnic, to BBQ, to authentic truck-stop cafe, so it's been pretty good so far.

I should point out that apparently, the best non-commercial ethnic offering in town is sponsored by the college's FACS department (yes, I know, this is a shameless plug for something my fiancee's department sponsors ...). Starting this Friday, my fiancee's department hosts a series of ethnic meals on Friday evenings called Friday Night Cafe. While I have yet to experience it, she assures me that I won't be disappointed, and we do have tickets. (Okay, end of shameless plug.)

Otherwise, for commercial ethnic, we have several different choices. For Greek, Italian, and otherwise fine dining, there's A&G next to downtown. It's nicely appointed, with outdoor patio and bar, and it's most notable for Friday night Greek nights, as well as some nicely done entrees. In particular, the rack of lamb is exquisite, but a little steep at $22.00 per person, which is why it's best done for special occasions or split between 2 people. For Greek, they serve a full range of Greek specialties (gyros, souvlakia, mousska, spanikopita, souvalaki, roasted chicken, accompanied by pita, salad, and rice pilaf, etc.). On average, prices range from $5-10 dollars for lunch menu items, to $17-22 for dinner entrees.

http://www.a-g-bar-grill.com/

The salads include some unusual ones, including a pecan crusted, blue cheese chicken, as well as the usual Cobb and chef varieties. The entrees range from upscale bar-grill items through nice entrees, with restaurant burgers, chops, steaks, sandwiches, pasta entrees, and a wonderful lunch menu (lighter pasta entrees, some of the chop and steak options from dinner, twice-baked potatoes, a Greek sampler plate if you're eating there other than Friday night, and wraps). The lower-priced lunch menu includes soup and salad combos, a reasonably priced quesadilla with dipping sauces, and even liver and onions (yeah, I know, it's sick, but I like liver and onions).

They also do a spa menu with some lighter pastas and salads, including a honey-balsamic glazed salmon and spinach combination, and most of the entrees are accompanied by A&G's home-baked bread and honey-butter ... one loaf of that, and you're almost full already.

Their desserts are also well-done, including a tiramisu that's slightly more frozen/chiled than the average, a wonderfully done bread pudding (Lauren's favorite), which for a little extra can be served flaming (soaked with Barcardi 151 rum), and a newly introduced frozen lemon custard/cake that also does well. However, my favorite dessert there is a baked apple pastry (baked apple wrapped with pastry, dusted with cinnamon, and served with ice cream and whipped cream).

For Chinese, we have a few options here ... The Mandarin (American Chinese, nothing fancy, and Happy Garden, which again is fast-food Chinese). The other alternative for Chinese here, strangely enough, is the local Hy-Vee supermarket. Surprisingly, they do put out a good product ... again, nothing fancy, but not bad, either.

The other ethnic alternative is Mexican: La Bonita and a new place which will replace the former Julios (which was closed due to alleged undocumented illegal alien staffing problems).

The remainder of Maryville's restaurants can be broken down into the following categories:

1)Sports Bars and Grills

For the most part, this is taken up by JWs, the revamped former Bobcat Grill on campus, and Carsons, a newly opened sports grill downtown.

In the Student Union at the college, JW's is basically a sports bar with free trivia machines and games, but without the alcohol (since Northwest is a dry campus). They serve a pretty decent (and decently priced) range of burgers, entrees, soups, and salads. Lauren puts a vote in for the buffalo chicken salad, while I've found that they do a mean BBQ beef sandwich on Texas toast. We both agree that their best offering is a homemade kettle-fried potato chip that is worth indulging in once in awhile (otherwise, it would be detrimental to our health). JWs is mainly used by students and faculty, but anyone can eat there.

The other, recently opened sports bar is Carsons ... we haven't eaten there yet, but once we do, we'll let you know how it was.

2)The aforementioned BBQs ... Bubbas BBQ and Fixins, Pink Floyd (catering, but they sometimes do parking lot sales) and Hey Vern (also parking lot sales). Lauren has mentioned Bubbas before. It's owned by a local American Royal competitor who has won several times there ... if you want large portions, incredibly large pulled meat BBQ sandwiches with an incredible dry-rub (that should not be profaned with sauce, according to Bubba), and award-winning bacon/cheddar/onion smashed potatoes, Bubbas is where to go (although it's now only open on Wednesday-Sunday, probably due to BBQ competition season). Pink Floyd and Hey Vern, I haven't had yet, so I'll have to reserve an opinion on them for later, too.

3)Fast food and family food chains - Subway, Pizza Hut, KFC, Sonic, Applebees, McDonalds, Hardees. Been there, done that before. Enough said about them.

4)Truck-stop cafes - Gray's. Outside of town on Highway 71, Gray's is your typical truck-stop cafe ... inexpensive burgers, breakfasts, weeknight specials, and daily desserts. Not bad.

5)Coffeeshops - right now, we only have two, Main Street Coffee, a small coffeeshop located next to the fitness center on Main, and a small one embedded in a local used antique/bookstore. We used to have a third, but it went out of business. We have heard rumors that a Starbucks may be coming into town (part of that 22,000 new stores they have planned), but so far, that's just a rumor. A St. Joe based coffeeshop may also expand here, but that's also a rumor as well.

I should point out that most of our eating out usually takes place at the local Hy-Vee salad bar, inexpensive and good for our diets, or else we grill out or stay in and cook ... speaking of which, I need to dig out that lamb curry recipe I promised to make Lauren this weekend ....

At the Faire

This weekend found Lauren and I at the Kansas City Renaissance Festival. Lauren's been a regular Faire-goer since her grad school days, and I've been to the Faire a couple of times before, but never "in garb" (i.e. costumed). That changed this weekend. Surprisingly, we found enough accessories to take the basic "peasantware" Lauren found for me off eBay and turn it into a fair approximation of a merchant's costume.

Lauren also wanted to go see her one of her favorite Ren Faire music groups, a "fusion" bagpipe group (seriously!) named Tartanic. Tartanic mixes non-traditional piping with Middle Eastern and Irish drums, sometimes taking indecent liberties with traditional 'pipes music, and tossing in a little live comedy, all to prove - as their lead bodhran player asserts - that "bagpipes aren't just for funerals anymore".

http://www.kcrenfest.com

http://www.tartanic.com

Tartanic at the KC Ren Faire





















































On the way home Sunday, we stopped at Lauren's favorite Indian restaurant, Swagat, for lunch. Words can't do justice to this North KC restaurant, which features frankly the best Indian buffet that both of us have ever had, from over 12 choices of fresh tandoor-baked breads, to curries, vindaloos, tandoor-chicken, and desserts, including carrot halva.

http://www.visitswagat.com/

This Weekend

Pretty quiet weekend here in Maryville. Lauren's birthday was Monday, so Monday night, I took her over to the college to see the Air Force's Band of the Midwest at the auditorium. Not a bad show at all.

No game day this weekend ... the Bearcats are away at Kirksville, and instead, the state's homeland security division is doing a terror/disaster drill on the campus (translation: stay away from the exercise zone this weekend).

Lauren's parents are down for their traditional post-birthday visit. We're probably heading over to St. Joe for a little antiquing and shopping.

Game Day

Northwest's Mascot - Bobby Bearcat

This weekend found us once again at the football stadium for the second game of Northwest's season. It was a bit soggy, with light showers up to game time soaking everyone, but we braved the pre-game tailgate anyway. Umbrellas are prohibited in the stadium proper, and although Lauren had brought a rain slicker along, it was an orange-red color far too close to the colors of the opposing football team (Univ. of Nebraska-Omaha) for comfort, so we purchased a couple of disposable clear plastic rain slickers ... granted, they made us feel like we were covered in Saran Wrap, but they kept us mostly dry during the day.

The game featured the "duel of the bands", as UNO brought along their marching band, too. After a close start (10-0 at the half), Northwest pulled away to shut UNO out 31-0.

Pre-Game Pep Rally - Band

































Pre-Game Band Show














Introduction of the Bearcats

Questions and Answers

Just a quick update and Q and A post:
1. Am I employed yet? Not yet. It's mildly frustrating. Still checking the job listings as much as possible, and I'm still hoping I can find something that would let me telecommute or work an alternative work schedule. Gas prices are still way too high to even consider a regular commute somewhere. I'm ready to work again. I really am.
2. Is the house being painted this week? Yes it is; we're not doing a full painting, but a sand down and touch-up paint of a few places that needed work. We should be done by Friday evening, so we can take that off the to-do list. And the place does look much nicer.
3. Am I tired because of (2)? Yes, I am. Very. Fortunately, the list of "to-dos" involving the house has shrunk considerably. The only major items left on the home improvement list will unfortunately have to wait until I find a job and/or we're graced with a lottery win. Both would be nice.
4. Do we have plans this weekend? For the moment, it will likely be tailgating on Saturday, followed by the local Northwest Mo State football game, and a possible RenFaire trip down to the KC Ren Faire. We should have pictures to share after this weekend. The former has me slightly conflicted, as I'm now rooting for a college that is a conference football rival to my alma mater (Pittsburg State). It should get really interesting around the 1st week of November, when the two play down at Arrowhead Stadium.
5. Is Lauren's birthday coming up? Yes it is ... her birthday is Sept. 11th (easy to remember, unfortunately); we'll have to stretch out celebrating it over two days, since Monday is her "loaded" class day, including her evening class. I've already hidden her birthday gift.

We're Staying at Home This Week ....

Because we've been on the road for the almost the last two weeks ... after a few days' recovery from the last road trip; Thursday found us on the road again to Lenexa for a distance learning conference that Lauren was presenting at. Following an overnight stay, we headed down to SE Kansas to show Lauren where I grew up and went to college.

Through the weekend, I showed Lauren around Pittsburg and Girard, stopping off for lunch at the Mall Deli and later for dinner, letting her try SE Kansas chicken! For those of you who don't know about it, there are two "dueling" long-time chicken restaurants down in SE Kansas that make chicken unlike any other restaurant I know of: Chicken Annie's and Chicken Mary's.

http://www.ckt.net/zagspage/cag/

http://ktwu.washburn.edu/journeys/scripts/2002/1507c.html

Before we went down, Lauren was a little skeptical of how good the chicken was, so we ran a taste test of Annie's chicken on Friday evening before doing the county fair, and with family friends Carl and Millie Larcom, headed for Chicken Mary's on Saturday night ... after comparing the two, Lauren decided that Mary's was better (which makes me the lone family holdout for Annie's ... sigh).

Friday evening was spent at the fair;, where Lauren got in her quota of ducky, wabbit, and horse petting ;-), and we also got to experience another tradition: homemade county fair ice cream. I also saw a couple of former high school classmates and caught up on how they were doing.

On Saturday, we journeyed over to Joplin, MO for lunch to see a very nice bistro and Victorian/Italian styled garden shop called Sandstone Gardens:

Exterior
















http://www.sandstonegardens.com/main.htm

Interior of the Garden Shop















From there, it was a quick jaunt to Carthage to see Precious Moments ... we wanted to stop off at Marion Days in Carthage itself, but decided not to ... way crowded.
















Early Sunday afternoon found Lauren and I taking a short train ride ... the local SEK Railroad Association had brought down a steam locomotive and several (thankfully air conditioned) passenger rail cars, to run a short trip out into the country and back. Lauren's a bit of a train buff, having grown up next to the Rock Island line, and also having ridden the train to and from Chicago, so she really enjoyed the trip (even though the air conditioning cut out half-way through). Not having ridden trains very much, I was a little concerned by the pronounced rocking of the cars, but Lauren assured me that a)this was normal, and b)it wasn't bad compared to other rides she'd been on.

After lunch at Pittsburg's newest Thai restaurant, Typhoon (which we can both recommend), we stopped by the Knoll's (Linda and J.T.), for introductions and catching up, and then headed home, getting back to Maryville just before an oncoming round of thunderstorms delivered some much needed rain.

Road Tripping

Mark Twain Lighthouse - Hannibal, MO

Home again, home again ... we're back home in Maryville after a week's worth of traveling, having left last Friday on a road odyssey/vacation that took us through Mt. Vernon, IA, to Marseilles, IL to visit Lauren's parents and family, to Urbana-Champaign, IL, to visit Lauren's friends whom she hadn't seen in several years, to Hannibal, MO, boyhood home of Mark Twain (and now tourist attraction du jour ... everything in the town either had Mark Twain's name attached to it or was related to the Tom Sawyer/Huck Finn mythos in some way ... we guessed that Clemens would probably be rolling in his grave if he knew what his name was now attached to).

Along the way, our journey took us to several bed and breakfasts, including Blythe Cottage Inn in Mt. Vernon (a nicely appointed basement and cottage house), and Lulabelle's in Hannibal (now a very well run B&B and restaurant-bar next to the river. It plays off the noteriety of the building's former use as an, ahem, brothel, in earlier days).

We also found a selection of coffeehouses in various locales ... Fuel and Brewcasso in Mt. Vernon, as well as another in downtown Champaign (sorry, we forget the name), and Java Jive in Hannibal (where we found out that even Mark Twain frequents the place for coffee ... one of the local faux Clemens was there in the morning). As Lauren observed, "looks like even the local characters stop here."

Brewcasso Exterior and Fish Boil


































Mt. Vernon found us stopping at Brewcasso last Friday night for a different reason: their take on the "Door County Fish Boil". The summer hosts at the coffeeshop had been throwing several special reservation-only dinner nights; the previous Friday's meal had been an Ethiopian one, but the one we attended was a Door County, Wisconsin tradition from the days of Norwegian fishermen where whitefish and potatoes were cooked over an open fire (in particular, the fish were boiled to remove the "fishy" taste from the fillets). The hosts, a nice couple from Wisconsin with 10 kids (5 adopted Ethiopian), had decorated the dining area with Packers memorabilia and were playing football-themed music.

Brewcasso Interiors




















http://www.brewcasso.com




















While we watched the preparations and chatted over appetizers (Wisconsin cheeses and summer sausage, accompanied by a chilled raspberry soup), the hosts performed the ritual of boiling the fish and potatoes (apparently, the important part of the boil is the boilover, which removes the starch and also helps put the fire out). Needless to say, the meal was excellent, accompanied by several varieties of fresh bread, and topped off by fruit pie a la mode from a local church bake sale (trust me, it's Iowan fruit pie ... having lived there for six years, I've found there's none better).

The Boilover




















After a light breakfast at the B&B, the following morning found us stopping by Fuel, another equally eclectic coffeeshop in town, for tea. (If you do make it there, be sure you arrive there early after opening for their berry scones ... hot out of the oven and crumbly.) We had to get back on the road shortly thereafter, but not before we sampled prune and poppy-seed kolaches at the local farmer's market.

Lunch found us at the "original" Iowa Machine Shed restaurant in Davenport, where Lauren was quite amazed by the decor (I think it was the hayrack/tractor rides they give in the parking lot that really impressed her).

With that, it was on the road to Marseilles and a stop at Lauren's parents for a few days of visiting her family, including meeting her Aunt Peggy and her sister Lisa's family, some walking "down near the river" during Marseilles Fun Days, a trail walk and sightseeing at Buffalo State Park (complete with buffalo), followed on Tuesday by breakfast and some sightseeing at Starved Rock State Park (named for the historical massacre of a band of Illini Indians by a band of Potawatami where the Illini were chased to a bluff, surrounded, and "starved") ... I'm given to understand that in more recent days, the park has its share of accidents (falls), often caused by stupidity, where people fail to realize that the law of gravity applies there as elsewhere in the world ;-).

Below: the Great Hall of the Starved Rock Lodge















The Buffalo at Buffalo State Park















On the way back from Starved Rock, we did some wine tasting, and Lauren also introduced me to Polancic's tenderloins ... she has often commented that the tenderloins done in her area make the best tenderloin sandwiches out there, so of course, we stopped for lunch so she could prove this to me. After that stop, she was proven right.

On Wednesday, we set out for Urbana-Champaign, arriving at about 10:30 that morning for a slightly rainy walk downtown and some shopping... among the finds were (for me), a 1st ed. copy of the Star Trek Concordance, and for Lauren, a Christmas gift. Later on, a find for the parents was a Senseo pod coffeemaker at the local Habitat for Humanity store.

The afternoon brought lunch with Mariellen, one of Lauren's Quaker friends, and a small tour of the UIUC campus, which I "almost" attended back in 1996 (and in one more case of "almost but not quite", I would have missed Lauren by about 3 years, as she had departed in 1993 for upstate New York). One stop was Espresso Royale in Urbana ...as Lauren noted, the back room space was reportedly once a bar that was George Lucas' inspiration for the cantina in Star Wars.

The evening brought dinner at the "best Thai restaurant in the Urbana-Champaign area" with friends from Lauren's former "Saturday Night" group (from left, Ken Sarno; the group's informal mentor, U of I professor emeritus Les Savage; Chris Mayer and Mike Barkley; followed by Lauren and myself), followed by a stayover at Ken's "new" house out in the country 25 mi. south of Urbana (which provoked a small amount of house envy ... especially when Ken showed us the new addition which will eventually house the hot tub).

Lauren's Friends at Dinner











Thursday afternoon and this morning brought us to Hannibal, where besides the aforementioned Lulabelle's (staying in the "Gypsy Rose" room), we occupied ourselves at the local stops, scavanging for scrapbooking supplies for the wedding guestbook/scrapbook, dropping in for ice cream at Becky Thatcher's, earning survival certificates for climbing the 244 steps up to the Mark Twain Memorial Lighthouse on top of Cardiff Hill (and making it back down again), as well as stopping at Jam Session, the local pipe and bowed instrument shop, where we both tried a bowed psaltry and Lauren added a new tin whistle to her collection.

At Java Jive, we lamented with some of the local customers a recent city council decision to remove the trees from the downtown area because they thought that the tourists would be offended by the bird poop. The crews with the chain saws were out even as we watched.

Wedding Planning

Once again, it's very, very, very hot in Maryville (95 yesterday, 91 today, 97 Saturday, 98 Sunday) ... but not at our place ... thankfully, the HVAC crew passed their certification test and finished up the heat pump installation, and we've been in cool comfort for the last few days (especially since the storms that came through yesterday evening). We're hoping we can go to the local county fair sometime today or tomorrow.

On other fronts, Lauren and I finally started doing wedding planning (budgeting, getting reservations, checking with family, etc.). It's been a little stressful at times (paring down the guest list, for one thing), but slowly but surely we've been making arrangements (church, officiant, and reception), designing our invites, pouring over websites for cost-conscious wedding ideas, doing our budget planning, selecting attendants, and coming up with something nice out of it for all of us. We'll have more details later as we go. In case anyone is wondering, we're registered at Wal-Mart, Target, Bed Bath and Beyond, and Amazon.com ... just do a search on either Leach-Steffens or the reverse, and you should find us.

Sleepy Sunday

Today's been a sleepy Sunday ... 4th of July is fast approaching, and it's been really warm again here (temps in the mid 90s Friday, and a 100- degree day yesterday), so apart from church this morning, both of us have been keeping indoors under the a/c, with the exception of a walk Saturday morning (while it was still a little overcast) to the local Farmer's Market. Between the walking and going on a diet, Lauren's lost about 8 pounds so far ... she doesn't think it's noticeable, but I do. And for me, it's good for my health, as well.

We'd planned to go camping out at the lake Monday and Tuesday for the 4th, but the threat of storms for the next few days has ruled that out, and a road trip to central MO wine country got postponed (Just as well, given the 10 cent a gal. price hike in the last few days).

Over the weekend, we took a break from the Babylon 5 marathon of the previous week and finished watching the last half of the anime series "A Vision of Escaflowne" ... quite enjoyable, except I still wonder what happened with the ending, which to me made no sense given the characterizations of the two leads, Van and Hitomi. We suspect a last minute (and poorly written) rewrite or editing cut (or maybe a badly translated dub). Without spoiling the ending, suffice it to say that if you are a romantic, you'll likely be disappointed (and tempted to write your own fan-fic ending to replace it). Note: this is the series version of Escaflowne, not the movie reimage which, in the opinion of my fiancee, got everything wrong.

Weekend Camping

Lauren and I were up in Des Moines this weekend for a camping trip and to visit friends. Every year for the last couple of years, the Tai Chi group/book club I belonged to has held a solstice celebration ... a campout where we reflect, let go of past issues, and enjoy feasting and friendship. I hadn't camped out for awhile, but things went quite smoothly, the weather cooperated, and we all had a great time.

I also got to stop by my old church and catch up with everyone ... it was good to see everyone there.

Way Cool Blog

There are blogs, and then there are blogs ... while surfing over the weekend, I ran across the coolest weblog/informative/life improvement site (especially if you're a geek, as both myself and my fiancee can lay claim to the title).

The site is called Lifehacker ... it's a tasty mix of techie information, personal improvement widgets, and out and out tips and nice to knows.

http://www.lifehacker.com/

It's Just Too Darn HOT Here

Literally. The temperature in Maryville this afternoon is up to 99 degrees. We're hoping that it rains and cools down this evening and weekend ... and just that. We'd hoped to go camping this weekend (a trial run out at Mozingo Lake, a few miles out of town, to test out the camping gear), but between the weather (heat going to a chance of storms later on), and the bass fishing championship out there, which has probably taken up most of the RV and tent camping slots, the lake is probably too darn busy. Oh well. There'll be other weekends.

Apart from some brief trips outside to do maintenance on the watercourse (cleaning a pre-filter), cutting some fresh dill from the garden for a lunch dish, and some garden watering, we're staying indoors and vegging today under the a/c.

House History

A couple of days ago, a couple of visitors dropped by in the morning. As it turns out, one of the visitors, an older gentleman, was visiting relatives here in Maryville, and stopped by to see his old house and take pictures ... he had lived here back in the early 1950s. What followed was an interesting discussion about the house's history, which at the time he lived here, was apparently quite smaller. Until he built on a few pieces, the northern third of the current living room was an open porch and both the storm cellar/back deck/porch and second bedroom/office and bathroom didn't exist. When we asked him what they did for a bathroom, he pointed to a grove of trees next to the garage and said, "We had an outhouse back there." (It's long gone and filled in, but it probably explains why the trees grew pretty well in the back yard!)

It became quite clear that we owed this gentleman a lot (in particular, the comforts of indoor plumbing).

The Beginning of the Sleepy Season in Maryville

Well, it's Memorial Day weekend in Maryville. Which is to say, "There's not much going on around here." We enjoyed a weekend of sunny weather until, of course, today -- so we're celebrating the beginning of grilling season by not grilling.

Not to say all is boring in the summer in Maryville. It's definitely a different feel to a town whose social life is largely driven by what's happening at the college (or, alternatively, what's being served at Your Maryville Hy-Vee). Summer in Maryville tends to include the following attractions:

1. Horses. At Sonic Drive-In. As one enterprising young rider put it, "Saves on the gas money."
2. The Chatauqua. At least every other year, we get a visit from a traveling show of historical reenactors. This year, the event highlights Theodore Roosevelt, Fred Harvey, and George Washington Carver, among others.
   
3. BBQ. BBQ is a constant, between Bubba's new restaurant and roadside stands like Hey Vern's and Pink Floyd's. (However, too much BBQ will lead to me being a BBW.)
4. "Getting the Runs will give you the Blues". No kidding -- this was the official t-shirt of the Maryville Marathon/Blues Festival a few years ago. These events are hosted in the same weekend.
5. The Art Fair. There's some pretty good local and traveling talent that shows up at this small art fair every year in early July.
6. The County Fair. See and be seen -- what else does one do at a county fair? (Personally, I like the big slide...)
7. Fishing and camping at Mozingo Lake. It's finally getting warm enough that tent camping doesn't require thermal survival blankets.

I haven't even mentioned the surrounding area, which features such gatherings as the Hopkins Picnic, the Pickering Horse Show, the Graham Fish Fry, and some other happenings I haven't discovered yet...

On The Road Again (continued)

Yesterday was an experiment in mobile blogging ... I sent in yesterday's entry with my Treo, and would have added the photos from the trip, except we're still experimenting with a way to get the photos from my Treo to a laptop for uploading; you can post photos by e-mail on Blogger, unfortunately, none of my e-mail access from my Treo supports file attachments. I would have considered grabbing the photos off my SD card using Lauren's laptop; unfortunately, the hotel we were staying at had minimal Wi-Fi coverage ... only enough for her to check e-mail before wimping out, so I waited until I could sync the pics over to my laptop the next day after returning home. In any case, after a four hour drive back from Columbia, I'm adding this post with the pics before taking a loooong nap. Long drives are starting to get harder on both of us, I'm afraid.

The drive down and back left me with a few pithy conclusions about the state of interstate travel these days, none of them positive:

1. Despite gas prices lowering from their highs of recent months, it still seems like there is gouging (or some inaccurately caliberated pumps) out there. $15.00 doesn't fill your tank anymore (and I drive a fairly fuel-efficient and well-maintained car).
   
2. With troopers patrolling less and less due to increased gas prices, the days when most interstate drivers only kept to 5 or 10 miles beyond the speed limit are long gone. Average road speeds are now in the mid-80s/low 90s. With no enforcement, and long distances, people will speed because they can.
   
3. Because of point #2, tailgating and rudeness is on the rise. I had several cases where someone rode my back bumper, forcing me to slide into the slow lane, or used the slow lane to pass me.
   

The high points from the trip:














On the way down, Lauren took me to lunch at a Missouri winery/restaurant, Les Bourgeois, near Rocheport, that she had been to before and thought highly of, for both the view from the restaurant and the food. The pictures are of the restaurant and the incredible view from it, which overlooks both the Katy Trail and the Missouri River.















The food itself, we can both attest, was as good as Lauren promised, between a split appetizer, Cuban pressed sandwich for me and a panini for her, followed by a split dessert, and I'd highly recommend eating there, if you're on your way through Missouri on I-70. Their website address is below:

http://www.missouriwine.com

After the intern visit in Jeff City, we trundled back to Columbia for the overnight stay, and after checking into the hotel (and waiting out a nice rain shower, as well as meeting one of Lauren's professional organization colleagues to transfer a portable whiteboard), a search of the phone book and some web reviews helped us sort through our dinner choices. On the way to finding the restaurant, we checked out the homes (among them, some very nice, and very old, four-squares).

For dinner, we found a (thankfully) very inexpensive Thai place called Bangkok Gardens (26 N 9th St) for dinner in the District (historical downtown) area. Lauren had the Tom Ga Kai (coconut milk and chicken soup), while I had the Laap (Larb). While the Laap was a little greasy (we agreed it should have been drained a little more), it was mildly but satisfyingly spicy ... bear in mind that Lauren has me "in training", while I have to be vary careful about my spicy food choices.

After dinner, we walked around the downtown and window-shopped, discovering a very nice wine/cheese store and restaurant (see photo); quite expensive (we were content to window-shop), but they had a nice mix of domestic, Missouri-grown, and French wines.

On The Road Again

Just a short post for now, with more later. Lauren and I are in Columbia, MO on the way back from Jefferson City, MO, where she met with one of the interns she is supervising.

Pet Me! Pet Me! Why Aren't You Petting Me?

Why aren't you petting me? Why?
Signed, Kitty.

Almost Done

It's almost done. After two weeks of intensive packing, loading, unloading, and placement, the move is almost done. All I have left to do is bring in the suits from the car and hang those, and go dry clean some bedding post-move, and it's done. The move, that is. And I've got Internet access back, so I can begin job hunting again.





















In and around that, it's been a series of home improvement and gardening projects. Thank God Lauren is better at that than I am. I'm merely content to hand tools or hold up items on the wall while she works, or rake, hoe, and water outside.

Thankfully, we've been able to fit almost everything in the house (Lauren swears that the house is doing a TARDIS imitation because the house seems to have more interior space now and seems even more roomier than before I moved in, and that's with everything I moved down) ; we've gotten the living room and office to the point that we can see the floor again, just in time for one of the kitties (who have been guest posting during the move) to do a protest dump or yak near the litter box.




















The indoor and outdoor projects are done or very close; the aforementioned gardening is almost caught up, quite a few home improvements are either complete (bathroom renovations, with the exception of new tile and the possibility of heating plate beneath it), or planned waiting only for a weekend's effort (painting the exterior), or, like the furnace replacement and central air addition, four season room/outside deck, and exterior garage (so Lauren can start winemaking again), waiting only for long-term money.

Busy ... yeah, it has been. But we've been improving things as they go .

Purrrrrrrrr

Purrr ... I'm Opalina, or Opie the tortoise Tabby ... life is good, even if that evil Stinky isn't speeding around the living room, trying to sniff my butt or get in my face. Hah. Like I'd let her if I could move fast enough .... it's bad enough that I have to ask her for typing lessons so I can write this. At least she isn't chasing me around the house tonight ... I get all of the exercise I can stand from her running after me.

Tonight, it's finally quiet here; no more pounding on the walls, no more moving things around ... and Stinky is nowhere to be found, while I'm lying on the couch (ah, pillows!) feeling the breeze from the ceiling fan ruffle my fur. I think I'll go shed ... my owner (aka, she who provides the food), says that I "projectile shed" ... can I help it if I have a thick coat?

I've perfected this "look" which the humans call "pathetic". I call it using what I have ... right now, I'm using it on the new guy so he'll pay attention to me. That's not working, so then I reach over and combine it with a little gentle pawing ... one paw, right on the wrist while he's typing, and stretch out the paw just so, all while giving him the most yearning look possible ... now he's petting me ... purrrr.

End of the school year...

Well, I have survived another crazy busy school year! Finals week was especially interesting in that Richard and his stuff started moving in at about the same time I started prepping for finals. This was surprisingly not traumatic -- even with painting the living room the night after giving the first final! He dealt amazingly well with my finals mode -- "Pardon me, sweetie, but I'm locking myself in this room for a while to grade more papers, okay?" He'll adapt pretty well to marriage with a faculty member.

The highlights of this school year: mentoring three new faculty members and enjoying that feeling of being an associate professor; getting a few more students interested in research; finally writing that research grant I have been threatening to write for three years; realizing that winning awards is not as important as living a balanced life. The low points: watching my Korean colleague Jang-Ae get harassed by students.

Now it's the summer season, which is somewhat more relaxed but still busy. I will teach an online summer class, meet periodically with two students doing research projects, and supervise about 12 interns in Child and Family Studies. I will also finish planting the veggie and herb garden, design a kitty garden and a small rock garden, weed ALL the gardens periodically, put edging in the front border and perhaps around the side and back, and finish fixing up the pond with new water course that was added this spring. Yes, that's LESS BUSY for me.

Meow!

Meow! I'm Stinky, aka Stinkerbelle, or what my humans call the "evil cat". They are busy moving things around the house, and playing with some very smelly white liquid-y white stuff. I sniff the air. It's not milk. I wish it was milk. I'd love to play in it, but I can't, because they have me in the bedroom, with the DOOR SHUT. So I thought I'd type on the laptop (my owner calls it "sitting on the keyboard", but I know better). I can't type very fast yet (you wouldn't be able to either, if you were using your butt and tail), but between that and my nose, I should get faster.

All of this noise ... furniture being moved, items being put here and there (more things to crawl over and under, too!)

Ah ... there goes the big guy ... the new one with the hair the same color as my fur. I'm going to see if I can run between his legs and get out into the living room ... DARN. Not fast enough. The door shuts again.

Meanwhile, my other two pals, Kitty and Opie, lounge, like moving was just another day for them. I bat Kitty, hoping to get a rise out of her; predictably, she rolls over and lies there. Opie, meanwhile, just ignores me.

Oops! Here comes my owner. She loves me, even though I bite her toes.

Packing

Funny thing, packing. You find things you had thought lost, revisit the past ... a playbill and parking stub from the first time I watched Phantom (the musical, not the movie); books from your undergrad days. You also find things that make you wonder why you kept them for so long (of course, those go to the dumpster).

Bowing to the Inevitable

After a couple of weeks of job hunting in Des Moines (without much luck), Lauren and I have decided that it's time for me to move. Toward that, I'll be moving to Maryville, MO, and moving in with Lauren.

http://www.maryvillemo.org/index.html

I've given my apartment office my 30 day written notice, and I've started packing (and taking the opportunity to sort and pitch). My last day in Des Moines (for now) is going to be somewhere around May 12th.

In a way, it was inevitable. Sooner or later, at least one of us was going to have to move so we could be together. With Lauren having the better job situation at her college, and me being out of work, I've got the flexibility to move. It's a little sooner than I'd planned (I'd hoped to move in September or as soon as a better job developed in KC), but apart from that, it's probably the best circumstances for me to move, with no current financial or job ties (i.e., no house to sell).

Despite that, it's a little bit daunting because of the trade-offs. I don't have a job lined up there yet, and there's the challenge of trying to fit two household's worth of furniture and belongings together (and for me, the additional challenge of moving my belongings down there as efficiently as possible). And there will be some adjustments: I'm going to be giving up a lot that's familiar to me: friends, activities, places, entertainment venues.

In its place, I'll have a smaller town, and I'll have to look for new opportunities. But I'll be with Lauren.

Progress

Spent this morning filling out resumes online and submitting for three more positions, one in KC, one here, and one in St. Joe, Missouri. I don't doubt my skills or abilities. However, after talking to a few of my peers in my profession and sounding out the state of the profession, it's become clear that I need to diversify, or consider openings in academia, because the number of technical writing openings in the financial services/IT industry has dropped considerably in the last few months; jobs that were there aren't there any longer, or are on very short-term contracts.

Now the question becomes: "what else am I good at?" I've already got two Masters degrees and I'm carrying student loan debt. What can I do to extend/expand my skillsets? Where should I go next?

The Busy Season

Poor Richard is having to deal with one stressed kitty here -- it's the Busy Season in academia (the other Ivory Tower). The busy season starts in late February with midterms, followed by grading midterms, followed by what could best be described as "Banquet and Honor Season" -- just this week, I have been at an evening reception to honor Who's Who among American College Student recipients, a dinner and commemorative lecture given by an alum of the department who now leads the Family and Consumer Science and Nutrition section at the USDA, and tonight is the department honor banquet.

Next week, thank goodness, is Spring Break here, followed by more receptions and banquets: the honor society I help advise is receiving an Outstanding Student Organization commendation Monday, and I am invited to the Tower Service/Committment to Quality banquet Tuesday because I nominated one of the winners (I think). One of these days, I'd like to go to a banquet where I am actually being honored!

Ivory Towers

Hi everyone,

Just a brief update: today was the second day of working for an unnamed financial services company as a consultant. It's rather funny: back in graduate school, we talked about working in the ivory towers of business or academia, and now I find myself actually working in a tower ... even though I'm on the third floor of the building, it's still a bit daunting ... the cubicles are bigger, the goals are higher, the processes are even more complex than any I drafted at my old company.

It's nice to know that despite the new job and the new faces, that some things don't change except in degree.

Of Gardening and Moving On

This weekend held a last-minute change of plans. Lauren was going to come up here, but after a dental appointment, her doc put her on antibiotics and Darvocet, a high-grade painkiller in the "don't drive or operate heavy machinery" class, so I went down to Maryville instead, which actually worked out ... it was a lot warmer down there, and we got to do some garden prep work (mostly weed whacking and burning of leaf/twig/roughage from last year's garden), some cooking, and a lot of cuddling.

And now it's this week, which will (due to some good news), bring my career at my current workplace to a close a week earlier than planned. In the good news, I was picked up by another company in town on a six month contract to hire position, so it will give me time to pay down debt and prepare for moving down to Maryville.

In a strange sense, it feels odd leaving a place I've worked at for six years, suffered at, perfected my tech writing skills at, given nearly insurmountable obstacles. It's been incredibly stressful, but also rewarding. And now it's time to move on.

It must be the cold weather or something...

I was driving home from Des Moines last night, and my thoughts were running in the same direction as Richard's, even to the "I can still smell him on my skin". I always thought that being able to smell someone after parting from them was one of those cheesy conceits of romance novels -- or else the guy was a gorilla with truly bad hygeine (which I assure you Richard is NOT).

Pheromones are real, because I can identify Richard's scent without being able to describe what he smells LIKE, other than "Richardness". For those who can't identify with this, find a little bit of that precious substance known as ambergris (or the somewhat-close substitute, "ambergris fragrance oil", carried by Frontier Cooperative Herbs). Uncap this and smell. The substance does not so much have a distinct smell as a elusive velvety sensation that evokes memory. The bare hint of indole which provides the musky note to the scent of fresh lilacs and jasmine gives a similar sensation.

Thawing Out

Lauren was up this weekend, as you probably guessed from the previous post. It was chilly enough that we mainly stayed in, apart from an emergency trip to the repair shop for a new car battery (the old one died under the -16 degree weather yesterday), and a trip down to the Home and Garden Show on Saturday down at the local events center, where we got to check out the latest in home trends, smell wonderful flowers, and try out one vendor's sauna.

Goodness knows, I can't remember when I considered temps in the low 20s reasonably warm, but there it is.

Sigh ... she's only been gone for over an hour, and I already miss Lauren. A lot. Yeah, it sounds cheesy, but I was taking off my sweater, and realized that it held her scent from cuddling earlier. Maybe I'm getting sentimental ... romantic ... whatever.

It's funny ... she just called to let me know she'd arrived safely back in Maryville, and she told me she was feeling some of the same things, too.

I already knew it was love, but it's nice to be reminded of it ;-)

It's fraggin' COLD out!

In Maryville, it's probably about 15 degrees, but here in Des Moines, it's 1.4 degrees out. That is 1.4, as in almost zero. And it's getting colder. I think it's time for hibernation...

Advice

Hi everyone,

I spent this weekend through Valentine's Day with Lauren in Maryville and really enjoyed myself ... I spent Monday checking into the local job situation and turning in applications for one or two jobs on campus. I also spent a bit of Tuesday doing housework ... dishes, raking the lawn, etc. And having a wonderful, romantic dinner Tuesday night after I surprised her at work earlier in the day to bring her lunch and a rose.

We're doing contingency planning right now, because of a recent development: on Monday, a placement agency called me and said that a local financial services company wanted to interview me for an opening.

I did the interview this afternoon, and they seemed impressed enough with me to bring me back in for a followup next week. It's a six-month contract to hire position, which means I could be moving six months from now if they don't take me on, or sooner (i.e., later in March, as we're now planning), if they don't hire me.

Being a Quaker, Lauren sometimes has cases where, in order to determine the right course of action, she submits a situation to a "clearness" committee, composed of fellow Quakers, who help determine what the best action (or no action) should be done. I envy her right now ... it seems all I've got right now are "possibilities", and none of them, unfortunately, seem to be collapsing from probability waves into useful options.

Getting better all the time

Well, the weekend with Richard went much better than I thought -- I needn't have worried:

1) He appeared to love my cats, who loved him THIIIISSS MUCH!
2) We think we can, with minor compromises, get his household and my household put together. But we're definitely going Winter palette in the living room to go with his Chinese wall hangings, while the bedroom is going to be home to the botanical prints and the Summer palette. (Time to find an appropriate wallpaper border for the living room)
3) He's really good at pitching in to organize and help clean -- we moved furniture, put some things (wine crates) in storage, and graphed the living room layout.
4) He prefers my mattresses to his (I know how to pick quality mattresses -- I AM a consumer economist after all) so the antique bed stays. (Yay! I dreaded putting that into storage!)
5) His allergies didn't act up.

Waiting for Gingercat

Today is the day Richard comes down to see where I live for the first time. Circumstances have dictated that I drive up there rather than vice versa -- I have the more flexible schedule, being an academic, and I have fewer evening and Sunday committments to work around. (I also think I like distance driving more than Richard does, but that's just a speculation). I have to admit that I am a little nervous because he's never met my cats nor seen my house.

We have somewhat differing styles of home decoration, which will have to be reconciled when we end up living in the same space. Luckily, I think there's enough overlap that we can reconcile these -- but he's going to be looking at a lot of rose-festooned wallpaper borders and cool pastels (summer palette) in the short run. My observation of his apartment: he favors a winter palette (bolder colors like black and red) and Chinese motifs. I think we're going to have to change the wallpaper border, at least in the living room.

The last male to comment on my house decor was someone I used to date (he doesn't really qualify as an ex-boyfriend, it was so casual) who said it "wasn't bad for having flowers all over the place." But his notion of style was Southwestern patterns and a preoccupation with bull terriers...

Introducing myself

I'm the Lauren, AKA Cheshirekitty, that Richard has been talking about ... If that doesn't answer enough questions, let me try for a few more answers:

1) I'm 42 years old, but I think I'm young for my age.
2) I am an associate professor at a small regional Midwestern college, but can be exceedingly silly at times.
3) I would have to live to be 224 to learn and experience all the things I want to in life.
4) I am owned by three cats: Opalina (the geriatric passive-aggressive tortie-tabby), Kitty Kitty Kitty-Kitty (the aggressively friendly odd-eyed white), and Stinkerbelle (the little monster).
5) I would like to have coffee and chocolate officially accepted by the American Dietetics Association as food groups.
6) My love of good food wars with my desire to be thinner than I am, so I struggle with maintaining my weight. I work on feeling beautiful no matter what my weight is, which sometimes is harder than other times.
7) My favorite relationship philosophy: "20 Dos and Don'ts of a Functional Relationship" by Eve Bernshaw: http://www.selfgrowth.com/articles/bernshaw4.html
Hi everyone!

Changes ...

Hi all ... with my impending nuptuals a year away, Lauren and I have decided to consolidate our blogs into one spot. The link to her LiveJournal blog will remain, but we'll post here moving forward.

How Windy Was It?

I know ... sounds like the set up for a Johnny Carson joke. How windy was it today? In some places, it got up to 60 MPH winds. Windy enough that a weather advisory was called. Windy enough that trash cans and branches were scattered. Windy enough that a revolving door I was going into broke when a strong gust pushed one of the panels (the one behind me), about four foot forward, briefly trapping me until the door guard at the drs. office got the panel in front of me pulled forward so I could get inside the building.

Now that's windy.

A Good Weekend

It's been a pretty good weekend. Lauren came down Friday afternoon and I took a couple of hours off work (having Lauren along helped when I asked the boss). Yeah, it cost me a couple hours of vacation, which will cost me a little bit of money in vacation cash-out. But right now, the time off and time spent with her is much more valuable.

Anyway, I'm hoping to spend next weekend down in Maryville, which, unless a job prospect pans out here, will turn out to be a scouting trip for how we're going to combine the contents of two households together. In my case, a lot of what I have is books and bookcases, and as for the rest ... we'll find a way to make it fit.

Remaining Hopeful

I was telling a former boss yesterday that the hardest part about being laid off was that I've generally been employable. This is the first time that I've been involuntarily unemployed, and I've only been voluntarily unemployed once (and that was for about a month and a half when I moved up to Des Moines and finished graduate school). I got a part-time job at a Waldenbooks, then got hired by my current company, and have been steadily employed ever since, so with one interruption, I've been employed since 1994 (12 years).

Is being laid off a shock to the psyche? Yes, it is, and there's small comfort in knowing that I'm not alone at my company.

So now the question is: where do I go from here? I've got skills, talent, and knowledge. I just have to find the right opportunity.

Honking Like a Lame Duck

One thing I've struggled with over the last couple of days is feeling like a lame duck. I think I need to simply get over it. I've got job applications out (8, up from 5), and perhaps it's time to look at this situation as the opportunity to find a new challenge.

And The Beat Goes On ...

Today came out a bit like yesterday. Found one more job prospect, applied for it, now I wait and cross my fingers. And pray I get a good result from it or any of the other five job apps I have out now.

I spent a chunk of this evening helping out one of the cubicle mates being let go, by helping her clean up her resume prior to an interview for an internal, customer service rep job which will let her stay with the company and keep her benefits if she gets it. It made me feel a little like being on a sinking ship and helping someone into a lifeboat, wondering "who the heck (besides my fiancee) is going to help me?"

Ah well ... at least if she gets the job, I'll get a free dinner out of it. And then I'll get her workload until it's my turn to bow out.

That Lame Duck Feeling ...

Today was the first day back at work following the layoff announcement. There were a few items to take care of, but the day seemed to go by rather quickly ... a blessing, in and of itself, I guess. I told my fiancee, who does a three-day breast cancer fundraiser walk in KC, that I feel a little like she must have felt when she finished the walk: "tired, exhausted, and wondering 'what next'?".

The insurance industry is a very tightly competitive market these days, and while my company has put up a good fight, it simply doesn't have what it takes in financial resources, nor is it taking in what it should in revenues, to compete with the larger companies. I suspect that it's only a matter of time before a major chunk of my soon to be former department coworkers are eventually let go when the systems they support are eventually outsourced ... you can see the signs already.

In retrospect, perhaps it's good that I'm being cut loose now. I suspect that the troubles for my soon to be former company are just beginning; despite the company's stock price being 20 points above where it was when I first started here, the belt tightening has continued for the last few years and will probably continue long after I'm gone in terms of consolidations and staff reductions. For me, I hope that I can simply find a job that I enjoy, where I can use my skills to their fullest, and where I don't have to take a cut in income.

And The Search Begins ...

I spent today home from work (the soon to be expired job), some of it on the phone with my family, some of it checking out job listings from friends, some of it finishing the draft of a curriculum vitae (or CV), i.e., an academic version of a resume, and drafting cover letters. Lauren's been very supportive through all of this (thank God for that; I don't know if I could have faced this alone); she came up this past weekend and stayed through this afternoon. We went for some long walks ... her parents came down from Illinois and took us to dinner Friday night to celebrate.

Today we set a date for our wedding.

Tomorrow, I do more polishing on my work portfolio, put out a few more resumes. Offer up some prayers. Hope that out of all of this, the fear, uncertainty, and doubt subsides, and that something good turns up.

Pictures From Christmas ...

And here's some pictures from Christmas in Illinois with Lauren and me opening gifts ... more pics coming on CD, to be posted later.

It Was the Best of Times, It Was the Worst of Times ...

Hi everyone,

This was one of those weeks where it once again proved how quickly life can change on you. In the really good, life-altering/changing news, I'm now officially engaged. I've only told a few friends and family, and we haven't set a date yet.

In the not so good news, Friday (the 13th no less), myself and two coworkers in my workgroup were called into a meeting at HR and told that, due to a business decision (i.e., a need for more project managers, and no other money available to hire them), that the three of us were being terminated as of March 10th. It wasn't a case of work performance, but a case where they needed the warm bodies, and we got sacrificed as a result. Reactions ranged from shock to "nice while it lasted", and I immediately started shipping my resume out online, and checked off with my internal and external contacts to see what jobs were out there. I'd kinda been expecting this since October.

They're giving us decent severence packages, and at least giving us a few months to prepare, rather than giving us the boot immediately. I'll likely survive, and it may open up new options for Lauren and myself in terms of living together, but now I'm worried about the two coworkers, who weren't prepared for the situation, are now scrambling, and who both have (or will have, after this year), have kids in college.

I hope we all find good places to land.

Where I've Been ...

Hi everyone,

Quite a few of my friends have asked me why I haven't updated my blog in the last few months (since mid-September), and a lot of it has been due to changes in my life ... some positive, some needing a bit of my time and effort to address ....

On the "needing a bit of my time and effort to address" side, let's just say that there was some unpleasantness at my current job, which put me in an uncomfortable position and forced me to look at my career options. That's as far as I want to go with that description, given that other people read this, some of whom may be coworkers, and I want to stay on good terms with them, regardless of what happens.

For the positive changes ... let's just say that since the holidays, I've been seriously involved in a long-distance relationship with a wonderful woman named Lauren (see the pic) ; we've hit it off very well, and I've already met her parents over Christmas in Illinois (and they and the rest of her family likes me ... yay!). We're looking at our long-term options for now. I'd say more, but as she hasn't met my side of the family yet, there's something I have to hold off on saying until then. Suffice it to say that it is serious between us, and I love her. We even have pet names for each other: I'm her Gingercat (because of my playful nature) and she's my Cheshirekitty (because of her smile) ... (yeah, I know, it's hokey ... so there). I've included a link to her blog at the side (she hasn't updated hers either, but that's because we've been spending a lot of weekends together as of late, as well as the holidays).

So that's what's new with me ... it's been an eventful couple of months. I'll write more as I know (or can reveal) more ....

Finally ...

After getting nothing but voicemail for two days, I finally got word that everyone in the family made it out of Houston and is safe. Mom is in Waco, while the rest of the family is in Dallas. I can finally breathe a sigh of relief.

Oh Boy ...

And it gets better. Rita is now a Cat. 2 hurricane and may become a Cat. 4 by the time it reaches landfall. Ahead of that, mandatory evacuations have been ordered, so my family in Houston will have to evacuate ... Mom will go to San Antonio or Waco, while the rest of the family is heading to Dallas after boarding up the home.

Sigh ... Not Again ;-(

As some of you know (or may not), part of my family (sister, brother in law, and niece) lives south of Houston, TX, between Houston and Galveston. According to my sister, Tropical Storm Rita is predicted to strengthen to a hurricane (possibly a Category 3) and the current storm track (if it turns into a hurricane and stays one through the weekend), indicates that it may hit landfall at Galveston and continue northward right through the area that my family lives.

If they're fortunate, it veers east and hits elsewhere, and they're looking at bad weather: heavy storms and maybe some tornadoes. If they aren't, then it would mean evacuation farther north before the hurricane hits.

Unfortunately, there are some complications: Mom has some acute-care issues that need monitoring and meds, so she would be moved with her nursing home's residents to a sister facility in San Antonio. Adding to that, sis is also expecting later this weekend and they will have their hands full with that; they would likely evacuate to my other sister's place south of Fort Worth.

This has been one of these years ....

Carrying Your Candle (aka, Going to Light Your World)

A day or so ago in the local newspaper, one of the editorial columnists wrote a thought-provoking piece to compare the circumstances in New Orleans to what would have happened here, if we had had a hurricane-like disaster. FYI, Des Moines actually came quite close (anyone remember the Midwest floods back in 1993?) But in the space of a few paragraphs, he painted a grim picture. And to be honest, a disaster may be something we'll experience here in the Midwest 50 years' hence; not everyone realizes it, but the central Midwest may (at least, according to the prognosticators), be the site of a major earthquake, due to the New Madrid faultline.

This has been one of those weeks where it's been hard to look for the positives. Between watching the toll from Hurricane Katrina on the news and hearing of friends' personal losses (from Katrina and otherwise), it's been hard not to encounter someone who has lost someone or something dear to them, or who has lost everything. And this Sunday marks the 4 year anniversary of 9/11. I don't think any of us can truly say we understand what the survivors have been through, unless we have experienced it ourselves.

Looking for the bright spots, this Wednesday, I was practicing a piece I'll be singing in church Sunday. Called "Go Light Your World", it has this lyric: "There is a candle ... in every soul. Some brightly burning. And some dark and cold. And there is a spirit. That brings a fire. Ignites a candle. And makes us whole." For all the horror that we've seen on the media, for all of the political bungling, we've also seen giving on a scale not seen since 9/11. It's not a red state/blue state issue. It's not a Bush-hater issue. It's a human issue. In the years since 9/11, I have seen our country fragmented by soulless politics, by religous fundamentalism, by narrow- mindedness bordering on economic and racial prejudice, and by a dwindling share of compassion for others. It is my prayer and hope that for once, we see less politicizing, less divisiveness, and more compassion, and that our compassion for those in need, our candles that in recent years seem to have almost been snuffed out, are reignited and remain brightly lit.

Labor Day Weekend

Hi all, just taking the time out from the weekend to post. Weekend's been great so far; mini golf with a friend on Sunday, followed by a local blues festival downtown. This afternoon, I'm going casual at the grill. I did have a line on a new-agey gathering, but that didn't pan out.

Planet of the Apes

I was looking at a story online this morning ... two, actually, which when paired together, underscore the tragic nature of extinction:

1. Geneticists have recently discovered that a very small portion of DNA (about 26,000 bits, I believe), separates chimps from humanity, and that both chimps and humans share 99% of our active genetic material.

2. According to environmentalists, within a single generation we could see the near-extinction of the great apes and certain breeds of chimpanzees in the wild due to human encroachment (logging and habitat removal, hunting, and the onset of Ebola, which can be transmitted to them).

I know in the greater scheme of things, we have other concerns (the ongoing war in Iraq, the economy and rising prices, caring for the survivors of Hurricane Katrina) which are pressing, but it saddens me that we've discovered how close we are to another species and, at the same time, are now just realizing how poorly we have done by them.

Allez Cuisine!

I'm home this evening watching one of my few TV show must-watches: Iron Chef. Only the Japanese could make gourmet cooking a competitive sport. Tonight's surprise ingredient for the competition (ie., the "battle") is "Sea Urchin". I'm not sure what amazes me the most: the improbable combinations of ingredients, or that somehow, Chairman Kaga managed to stay so slim after tasting all 2,500 different dishes brought before him during the show's run.

Lions and Tigers and Bears (Not Really)

I was taking a look at my blog so far, and noticing with envy that my blog template didn't have a few things I saw and liked from other blogs, like space for additional links, and a cleaner design, so with some quick browsing and some edits, I've slapped a new face on the ol' blog this evening, after enjoying an interesting afternoon at the local zoo. (No, I wasn't an occupant ...).

Okay, I'm ashamed to admit it, but I've lived here for 6 years, and I haven't been to the local zoo once, so when a friend wanted to go see the new baby camel (born a week ago and quite cute to look at), I shrugged and joined her. What followed was a fascinating afternoon of checking out the animals (everything from the sea lions, to snow chimpanzees, to the aforementioned lions and tigers and baby camel, named Charlie), and an interesting philosophical discussion about keeping animals in zoos. On one hand, the discussion went, it would be really nice if these animals could be kept in or returned to their natural habitats. On the other, for some of these animals, a return to the wild would lead to an untimely death at the hands of a poacher. At the end, we agreed that at least in a zoo environment, they would be well cared for medically, would be fed well, and would have a better shot at surviving than out in the wild.

And Now For Something Completely Different ...

For something completely different, I'm going to let my closet sci-fi fan come out and play ... growing up, I missed out on the phenomenon that was Star Trek, with the exception of reading the James Blish novelizations of original series episodes (bear in mind, this was way before the era of tape and DVD). But I managed to make do with syndicated episodes of Space: 1999, and later on, PBS repeats of Doctor Who and Red Dwarf, shows such as Incredible Journey (a short-lived series set in the Bermuda Triangle that disappeared just as quickly), and Battlestar Galactica, as well as the original Star Wars and later, Buck Rogers. Finally, leading up through '79, the Trek movies kept me occupied until the resurgance of sci-fi on TV in the late 80s and 90s, with various incarnations of Trek, X-Files, Babylon 5, Farscape, and Stargate, now leading up to shows such as Firefly and the recent reimaging of Battlestar, which has made me consider why I like sci-fi. I guess I've always been a dreamer. Growing up, I wanted to be an astronaut, and I always seemed to identify with being "out there". Being one of the few Asian-mixed ethnic kids in a rural Southeast Kansas community, one became painfully aware of being "different", and I found my solace at the local library. I also had an innate fascination with technology and history, having grown up reading books like "Tom Swift", and Richard Scarry's Busytown series, as well as David Maculay's architecture and construction books: "Cathedral", "Castle", and "Pyramid", and in both the past and the future, I could see and visit places far away to remind me that there was more to the world than just the place I called my home.

End of Rant ... Back to Some Introspective Thoughts ...

Okay, end of rant (EOR). And on to some commentary about other matters in the news:
President Bush said on Wednesday terrorists had converged on Iraq and that pulling U.S. troops out "would only embolden them".

Now before you criticize me as a left-wing liberal, hear me out. I support the troops, and I agree that we have made some progress in giving the Iraqi people a better way of life, laid the groundwork for democracy, and started rebuilding their infrastructure (despite the excesses and waste of a certain company who shall remain nameless). But at what cost have we given the Iraqi's what they have gotten? It grieves me to see our military ground down on a yearly basis in a country where, despite the gains we've made, we've put our troops in harm's way because the justifications for the war have repeatedly shifted as the evidence for them has turned up empty. We ignored the risks (which were identified), prior to going to war, and we made some very bad assumptions about the conditions in Iraq following it, one of which was assuming that when the war was over, the fighting would be over as well and the troops could be brought home immediately.

Our situation in Iraq is rather like the story of the monkey that reached into a jar to grab a handful of nuts. Unfortunately, in grabbing a handful, the monkey realized he couldn't pull his fist out of the jar. Likewise, we've created a situation where we have no choice but to stay the course in Iraq; to leave now would likely lead to further destabilization and probably civil war. But we'll pay a price for what we've started.

The Sad State of Dating, Pt. 2

Just an additional thought or two to add to the previous post: I know that some people are busy with their lives, and that I understand completely. But when I invest time in getting to know someone and doing things with them, it's a little frustrating when that effort and investment isn't returned, or it stops getting returned. Oh yeah ... I may have given everyone the impression that I'm a little desperate in my search for a relationship. Desperate, not hardly. I enjoy my own company and have done so before. But there are some events that are best shared, and it's frustrating when you see people make promises (ie., to spend time with you or do things with you), that they don't keep and don't even share a good reason why. I wouldn't treat them that way, so why do people make promises and then fail to follow through on them? There's an insensitivity I've seen that, frankly, makes me glad that some of the people I've encountered I didn't get into a relationship with. After all, if that's how they're going to treat me online, how are they going to treat me in person?

The Sad State of Dating in Des Moines

Tonight's post is going to be a bit of rant. For awhile, I've had a personals ad up on a dating service called Match.com, and if anything, I've discovered a few things that really make me question the $24.95 a month I pay for it. Don't get me wrong. There are some wonderful people on there, and I've made some great friends off of it. (Lauren, Anne, Ann, Angie, Jenny, Megan, Martha, Kristi, you know who you are). But I've discovered a few trends which don't speak well for some of the women I've encountered on the site: 1)Some of them are seeking relationships when they shouldn't be, or have issues that need some serious self-work and, left unresolved, are not conducive to a good relationship. I had one case where someone I'd gone out with told me that they "weren't good with relationships" and pointed out that they didn't even have a pet or a roommate (even though they were on the site and looking!). 2)Some of them play insecure head games, or are dishonest with me, even if they don't realize it or not. Witness the women on the site who "wink" at me to express interest or at least go so far as exchanging an e-mail, but then suddenly disappear for no reason that I can discern. Then there are the women who swear that they're tired of the guys they run into on the service or dating in general, but then you see them right back on the site actively looking. 3)A few of them are extremely superficial and picky. I have had several cases where someone simply stopped communicating with me after swapping pics. Add it all together, and it makes me wonder if I'm ever going to meet someone who shares some common interests and might be open to an honest relationship. At this point, something a friend once told me is coming back to me now: it's their loss, and it's all a numbers game.

Naked Corn Dogs, etc.

The ISP tech finally showed up this morning to check the interior wiring and signal levels, and after about 45 minutes of redoing cable connects and also rehooking me up to the building splitter, determined that he'd done everything he could. It looks like things have improved ... internet's staying up, seems a little faster, and even the cable picture seems improved, so he's done his job, and I can resume adding to this blog.

It's been an interesting week, so far ... with the 'net down, I've taken the opportunity to get out and about, and had a really good time with friends at the Iowa State Fair (the only State Fair that's had both a musical and movie made about it), made a few new friends, watched some familiar musical acts (including a really wonderful "Stomp meets touring band" called "Vocal Trash" out of Texas), and managed to stay away from most of the good but not good for you Fair food. It amazes me that they somehow manage to find something new to deep-fry every year, from the deep-fried Twinkies and Snickers bars, to the "naked" corn dog this year ( a deep-fried hot dog minus the corn dog breading), and also find something new to put on a stick (pork chops, spaghetti and meatballs, etc.). The official Fair website is http://www.iowastatefair.org, if you're curious.

Reconnecting

Today's been an off day for me. Woke up this morning with bad allergy issues (the sniffling and other symptoms were pretty positive clues), so I called in sick to work, took my meds, and stayed home. Fortunately, the internet connection is back up; the local cable ISP has been doing something that's been causing connection drops since last Thursday. When you're used to always-on, suddenly off gets a bit frustrating.

The theme to this week so far seems to be "reconnecting". On Monday, I jumped onto Yahoo for chat, something I haven't done in ages because I'd resolved to spend less time online and more time getting out and seeking connections in real life rather than virtually (then back in the days when I was working two jobs and going to grad school and couldn't meet many people outside those arenas). In the last three days back online, I've encountered a friend from the West Coast who I lost track of for awhile after she got married and moved out to D.C. I'd heard from her once between then and now, and this time, I discovered that she had gotten divorced and is now in Tucson, pending a move next year back to San Diego. Then today, I had a nice chat convo and reconnected with a long-time friend from Oklahoma, who I met online when I used to live in Kansas. Funnily enough, we never actually "met" in real life until she had moved to Chicago and I had come to Iowa, but she was someone who was there for me and made the lonliness bearable during the first year following my breakup with the ex, and I realized today that I have never thanked her for being there for me.

Encountering both was a very pleasant surprise, and also a reminder that life has moved on for all of us. And a reminder that I'm still searching for (and yearning for) a sense of close connection here in Iowa. Yes, I've made some close friends across the country ... some from high school, quite a few elsewhere (some in MO, some in CO, some in MI ... all with some common interests and bound by the tenuous virtual filament of phone line and fiber-optic cables). I have also made a few close friends here as well, but seems like quite a few of my "friends" here are, in their own way, friends who come and go because they, like me, are also looking for a serious relationship, and when they get involved with someone, their other friendships get neglected. Why this is, I don't know, but I wish some people would be more considerate. After all, who is going to be there to cry with you when the relationship goes sour, or rejoice with you when the wedding invitations get sent out? Just a thought ....